Reset

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As I write today, I am on day 4 of a fast. 

Now, the Bible says fasts should be done in secret:

When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show others they are fasting. Truly I tell you, they have received their reward in full. But when you fast, put oil on your head and wash your face so that it will not be obvious to others that you are fasting, but only to your Father, who is unseen; and your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you. Matthew 6:16-18, NIV

So why am I declaring my fast to the world?

I tell you of my fast not to boast, but to confess. 

Every January my church encourages congregational participation in 21 days of prayer and fasting, and every January, I can't wait to start. 

This is because annually, by year's end, my family tends to be in need of a massive reset. 

Inevitably, by December our choices in food, the things we spend our time on, and the ways we treat each other have gone off the rails. So we fast--not from all food, but from the things that tend to have a negative impact on our health, energy, mood, and ability to function well in our family and in life. 

We fast--not from all activities, but from the default time-suckers that distract us from relationships, creativity, and actual joy. 

When the kids complain about something they can't have during this time, I remind them that every longing for something points to the need our soul has to be fulfilled, and that it can only truly be filled by God. I tell them to look at every challenge as an opportunity to receive more of the Holy Spirit (one of my favorite mantras, which I'm pretty sure I stole or paraphrased from Sarah Young's Jesus Calling).

My pro-fast mom-lingo is solidly on point. 

The problem is, my behavior isn't. 

Yesterday I realized that I was preaching a good game, but failing to live it out myself. When the desire would arise in me to watch TV (from which we are currently abstaining), I would reach for my phone--we didn't specifically outlaw endless social-media scrolling. I've been enjoying more productivity around the house and time for cooking and blogging, but the dial on my prayer-ometer hasn't meaningfully shifted at all. 

The point of 21 days of prayer and fasting isn't so much what I abstain from, but what I replace it with. When the urge to have _____ arises, I should view it as a reminder to pray. When the kids are tucked in and that sitcom-sized hole in the day rolls around, I should use the time to pray and be in the Word.  

Matthew 12:43-45 warns:

When an impure spirit comes out of a person, it goes through arid places seeking rest and does not find it. Then it says, 'I will return to the house I left.' When it arrives, it finds the house unoccupied, swept clean, and put in order. Then it goes and takes with it seven other spirits more wicked than itself, and they go in and live there. And then the final condition of that person is worse than the first. (NIV; See also Luke 11:24-26)

If I sweep my routine clean, casting out bad habits and making time for what matters, but don't purposefully replace them with what matters MOST, I make myself a host for the enemy. I open an Airbnb for the demons of lethargy, apathy, idleness, busyness, and all their friends. If I replace distractions with similar (but possibly more destructive) ones, I gain nothing. I lose. 

Four days ago I embarked on a great secular reset, but the one I need is Spiritual. Perhaps the same is true for you. Let's start over. It's not too late to put oil on our heads, wash our faces, fast, and pray. 




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